Stupid White Men

Now first things first, I nicked the title from Michael Moore, and I have to say I don’t like the guy. I tried to read five sentences of his book before I decided it was absolute tosh. Now without even an attempt of a literary review, I will just shoot him down on the fact that he is a fat guy that doesn’t shave – poetically referred to as Moore-ing down. If you want to be a coke and heroin addict that’s fine, look at Anthony Kiedis. His book was great, and most of his story is about speed-balling in rat-invested motels and under bridges – he got high most of the time and shagged pretty girls, and best of all he sang about it – while obviously being skinny. Mental note – tomorrow I’m going on a 10 day fast, a quick weight loss programme.

So getting back to the original idea of the post – talking about Zuma. If life’s a game and it’s about them and not you, then how did a place like South Africa end up in the hands of a guy like Zuma? I mean the guy is a crook, a thief and not particularly bright. He had sex with a girl that he knew had aids and then took a shower for prevention, which he admitted to under oath. Now the big puzzle is that he now officially runs the country. I understand the concept of I am a ‘C’ student hence I employ ‘A’ students, and that ‘A’ students are usually the race horses. But heck! Zuma is an ‘F’ student – that’s like the examiner had to look for marks and gave him a something for the fact that he at least put an ‘X’ down where he had attempted to write his name.

So a bunch of stupid white men couldn’t control the situation to an adequate level. If you think about it his formula is simple, old school sales called the hook line and sinker approach – the boiler room IPO pitch. Tell them what they want to hear, give them a little and when it comes to delivery, take everything they’ve got. Couldn’t the powers that be just have provided an alternative geyser who caught the 10.4 million idiots that voted for Zuma with a “lets sell you with a what you want to hear pitch”, and then by chance not delivered on the typical African Renaissance commitment to starvation, violence and disease? Think about it, lie – but for a good reason. We employed our actor with the condition that if he didn’t totally screw up the country he could get a golden bath and 100 virgins, as long as he showered before and after. Thinking about it, there might be a slight chance that Zuma is on a payroll, unfortunately the chances are slim. Assuming that is not the case, I have come up with a new saying:

Every time the supposedly intelligent operators lose the game. We can say they’ve been out Zuma-ed!

Haha the Americans weren’t out Zuma-ed, God bless America.